Lorilyn Roberts talks about shame, abuse, and purity

Lorilyn Roberts shares about purity

 

"I felt a hand reach underneath my blue skirt."

Have you ever been violated? No one has the right to violate you physically ‑‑ not your father, your stepfather, a friend, a boyfriend, a teacher, even a doctor. Your body is the vessel of the Holy Spirit. It is holy. No one has the right to de file you to meet his own needs, whether it be for sex, power, or control.

If someone touches you inappropriately, you should report it. Don't let guilt keep you from doing the right thing. That's called false guilt.

Your body should be kept pure before God. Someday, as a young woman, you will probably get married, unless God has given you the gift of singleness. You will want to give a body to your husband that's pure, that's never been touched or looked upon or used. Not only does that mean sexually, but you should preserve your body and keep it from being harmed by illicit drugs and underaged drinking. You may not know it, but all these things will hurt you in more ways than you realize. 

Along the same lines, don't go to websites you shouldn't go to. Don't look at pornography. All these things will give you a corrupted way of looking at sex and love. No longer with these things be beautiful, but there will be a sense of dirtiness and vulgar. What God created to be something beautiful between a man and a woman becomes perverted to the point of disgust. Guard your heart. If someone does something to you that makes you feel uncomfortable, that is God's way of speaking to you, warning you that a boundary has been crossed that is inappropriate. Don't sit idly by and allowing this kind of abuse to continue. . If you're young, it's against the law and the offender can go to jail. If you're not so young that it's against law, you're old enough to know you've been violated and seek help.

 

 

Shale's way of dealing with this is not the appropriate way to handle it. If you're like Shale and you don't have anyone to turn to, go on the web or look in the newspapers for crisis counseling centers in your area. Contact a church. Don't let yourself continue to be victimized. If you don't do something, it will continue and God has better plans for you than this. Remember, God loves you. Seek out a safe person you can talk to, but sometimes it's up to you to take that first step. Pray and ask God to show you what to do. God will never let you down.

Romans 12:1 says, "Therefore, I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship."

 

 Even if you have been violated, it's not too late to do something about it. With God is healing and redemption. Do something today and take that first step to get help.

 Even if you feel embarrassed by the situation, don't let that keep you from reporting it. God doesn't want you to live in guilt or shame ‑‑ trust in him and get help.

 "I'm fine." I smiled, pretending nothing had happened.

How many times are we offended by someone or something and we pretend that it didn't happen. Does that make the pain go away? Pretending that something bother us is trying to live in denial. It doesn't work. If we live in denial about something, we are limiting our future. How can God use us if we're living in denial? Denial about our past, what's happened to us, minimizing our hurts ‑‑ you can't help someone else if you have never dealt with your own hurts and pains. God is in the business of healing. He specializes in it. Allow him to come into your heart and bring you healing. Find someone you can share your pain with ‑‑ don't live in shame and humiliation. God has better plans for you.

Jesus went through the shame and humiliation of the cross so you wouldn't have to live in shame an humiliation. That was his burden to bear, not yours. Lay this burden at the base of the cross and rejoice that Jesus can carry this burden for you.

First Peter 5:7 says," Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."

 

Diana Brandmeyer's A Mind of Her Own

A Mind of Her Own

By Diana Lesire Brandmeyer

Tyndale House Publishing

© December 2012

ISBN 978-1-4143-8103-9 (Apple); ISBN 978-1-4143-8102-2 (ePub); ISBN 978-1-4143-8101-5 (Mobi)

e-Book $6.39

From the back:

Who knew making dinner could change your life? Louisa Copeland certainly didn’t. But when the George Foreman grill fell out of the pantry onto her head, resulting in a bump and a mighty case of amnesia, Louisa’s life takes a turn for the unexpected. Who was this Collin fellow, claiming she was his wife? And whose kids are those? Her name couldn’t be Louisa. Why, she was the renowned romance writer Jazz Sweet, not a Midwestern mom of three. Struggling to put the pieces together of the life she’s told she had, Louisa/Jazz may realize that some memories are better left alone.

 

My review:

Brandmeyer’s tale of a woman who’s spent her entire life hiding in plain sight from a decades-long secret she couldn’t make anyone understand. When a fortuitous bump on the head gives Louisa Copeland’s inner drama queen an opportunity to come and play, the whole Copeland family: overworked husband Collin, children Tim, Joey and Madison, along with Louisa, learn how precious the bonds of love and faith should be. 

Stay-at-home mom Louisa has another personality, Jazz Sweet, single romance writer, who’s been locked away. After her accident, Collin goes out of his way, not always graciously, to get his wife back, even when he finds Jazz a little more exciting than Louisa. Louisa, as Jazz, gets an opportunity to learn about her kids and husband, her life, from an objective point of view. She acts out the real hang-ups, pet peeves, and the child side of herself she never lets out to play, showing Collin that her life was not all perfect. When he finds and reads her journals, he finally understands what life has been like from his wife’s side. He becomes every wife’s dream husband, and when Louisa relives the trauma that set off her bout of amnesia, they work together to save their family.

Nicely done in the voices of Louisa, her alter-ego Jazz, and Collin, Brandmeyer never quite lets her characters get out of control, although you just know they’d like to. The children are typical big sister and little brothers annoying; Collins wants to make partner at the law firm, and Louisa is just lost, colorless, without intimate friends, virtually orphaned and completely without hope or faith at the start of the story. Jazz livens her up, and although she finds her faith she is still lost in her own life; a life that comes with a husband she doesn’t recall but is strangely attracted to, but a housewife’s role she has no interest in. 

The ending comes a bit too neatly and quickly, but the journey there was a pleasant and intriguing ride. What would Jazz do next? And how would the neighbors and her family react? That was great fun. Who wouldn’t want the chance to fall in love all over again?

Staci Stallings' Successful book marketing strategy

Keys to Creating a Successful Book Marketing Strategy

By Staci Stallings

© 2013

Spirit Light Publishing

The Indie Author’s Ultimate Guide series

 

Quit panicking and start learning!

Staci Stallings had to learn marketing basics the hard way, and wants to help others get from Point A (publication-whoo-hoo!) to Point B (being read—the real goal of an author) with the least amount of stumbling in the dark.

How can you not love a gift like that?

This short 70-page e-book will become a baby author’s new BFF in short order. Set up like a workshop of fifteen-minute lessons, Keys promises only to teach an author, not automatic over-night success. In fact, Stallings warns several times that learning to market is a process, and a slow one at that. Building trust takes time and effort, but it can be done. I love Staci’s goal: not only should I become a better marketer, I will be able to turn around and share the strategy with others.

The pre-advice alone is valuable: Besides, put out a Great book and Get a great cover, Get some good reviews right away. I made the mistake of not doing this when I attempted my first-ever electronic short story: Get those reviews set up early, because you’re going to get blasted by people who have way too much time on their hands and vitriol in their veins. They will lie in their reviews and be as nasty as possible. Having a load of honestly good ones ready to go will help sales.

Stallings shares not only great easy tips, but examples of how to do this in each section, from creating an online presence, how to act online, building a great landing page, and keeping the momentum going. Each segment of pithy advice is concise and powerful. Each lesson has a goal, from think (about the covered concept; e.g., how to reel in your readers) to examine (the covered topic; e.g., the strengths and weaknesses of your current strategy to reach your audience), to put some effort into getting reviews. Stallings includes a list of review sites, and shows you how to use them to the optimum effect.

 

Even a little paid advertising can be useful. Realize that being an author means learning about a lot of things you might never have considered “writing,” such as working with technology. If you’re not much of a grammarian, you hire an editor; if you’re not a tekkie, hire someone who is.

 

Some advice I can live with:

Don’t talk about yourself

Remember, it’s a marathon, not a sprint

Don’t try to do it along

 

Finally, Stallings advises the reader not to sit around, whining in fear, but to take a step in the direction of your dreams.

 

Packed with illustrations and easy to follow examples, the lessons in Keys to Creating a Successful Book Marketing Strategy are sure to meet your needs somewhere, sometime. Keep this book handy; you’ll refer to it often.

 

A matching book, How to Prepare, Launch, and Run aSuccessful KDPSelect Free-Day Campaign, will prove helpful to the Indie author’s arsenal.

 

 

Review of The Ride of Her Life by Lorna Seilstad

The Ride of Her Life

Lorna Seilstad

 

Revell

© May 2012

ISBN 10: 0800734475

e-book $5.38

Print $4.42 (currently offered as a bargain book on Amazon)

Third in a trilogy Lake Manawa Summers series

From the back:

She's planted firmly on solid ground.
He's ready to sweep her off her feet.

The only man pragmatic Lilly Hart needs in her life is a six-year-old. Widowed for three years, Lilly has decided to leave the home of her intrusive in-laws to stand on her own. However, her in-laws find her new life as a cook at Lake Manawa utterly unsuitable for their grandson. When an argument ensues, a handsome stranger—who designs roller coasters, of all things—intercedes on her behalf. But Lilly is not about to get involved with any man, especially this cocky gentleman. Little does she know she is about to begin the ride of her life.

My review:

I’d read the second book in the series for review and received this copy as a gift. This absolutely delightful story follows the progression of years of family fun and get-togethers at the Lake Manawa, Iowa, resort, around the twentieth century. Like the others, Seilstad presents a new delight of Americana: in this case, it’s the development of roller coasters.

Lilly had been raised in the house of a wealthy family who hired her mother as a cook. Lilly learned to be a ladies maid and a good cook, but when she and the son of another prominent family fell in love and married, she was caught in a strange place as not quite accepted by the high society, and discomfort in front of her former friend, whom she served as maid. This story takes place three years after Lilly is widowed, and raising her son on her own.

 

When the parents of her husband want to send her son away to boarding school, she takes him and sets off on a quest for independence. That quest is quickly challenged by a handsome roller coaster designer and builder. Through circumstances contrived and self-fulfilling, Lilly and her beau, Nick, along with Lilly’s delightful son, find and fight love.

 

Seilstad’s third book in the Lake Manawa Summers series is a spot-on charming historical story, with excellent research, that brings back a simpler time of life, when spending summers in a resort setting was all the rage, when roller coasters were the latest entertainment. Told from the point of view of both Lilly and Nick, with occasional narrations from their friends, The Ride of Her Life is a sweet, simple read that will take you away for a few very pleasant hours.

Reverend Michael Duncan shares about Shadows: Book of Aleth and his outlook on publishing

Christian author and pastor, Michael Duncan has served the Lord and the church for nearly 25 years preaching and teaching God's Word. He has shared God’s message across the U.S. and beyond and is currently the pastor of his church in the Pacific Northwest and a co-host on the Alive in Christ radio network. He is also on the executive board of the Northwest Baptist Convention and a board member of the Northwest Christian Writer’s Association. Given the opportunity, he may be found on the golf course! Michael has been married to his wonderful wife, Patty, for almost 20 years and they have three amazing children – all in their teens (which is the reason for the greying hair).

I have three novels in print, and two non-fiction books. All my books can be purchased through my website.

My latest novel is called Shadow Remnant.

(ISBN 9781480168268)

When truth is lost, liberty dies.

For a hundred years the United States has been gripped by martial law, with freedom and faith a forgotten memory. In the summer of 2132, Peter Sheridan learns this the hard way when he finds himself on the wrong side of the government–but the right side of freedom.

All he wants to do is escape the notorious education center and find his parents. But when he is shot and left for dead, he is rescued by a mysterious recluse and finds himself drawn into a world of chaos and intrigue.

Racing against time and the government to try and complete his father’s mission—Peter must reignite the call for freedom. To do so, he turns to the last hope for America, the mysterious group known as the Shadow Remnant.

Michael, What do you love about this book?

I think that this book (Shadow Remnant) is my favorite one I’ve written. It speaks to the nation today about the world that we might have tomorrow. It takes courage and determination to stand up for what is true, and often it is those who linger in obscurity that begin to make the most difference. It might be that just one voice is all it takes to turn a nation back to the truth.

What have you learned about writing and yourself since you started this book?

I learned that I am far more politically minded than I ever imagined. Being a political suspense/adventure book, Shadow Remnant became my effort to speak to a nation. I also learned that I am deeply troubled by the amoral direction our country is taking. The deeper I delved into writing the book, and the more I spoke with people around the nation, the more I realized that there is a fatigue in many conservative-minded people. Several I spoke with are at the point of simply giving up – not believing that their voice or vote makes a difference. I needed to write something that would encourage God-fearing, truth-believing people that it’s not too late.

Tell about your latest release.

You’re reading about it. J It is called, Shadow Remnant. The premise of the book – “When truth is lost, liberty dies.”

What three things do you know now about the publishing world that you wish you knew when you first started?

I have learned that patience, being a virtue, is an absolute necessity in trying to get a book published. Editors, agents, and the like are so overwhelmed with work that to actually make it to the eyes of a publisher is a time-draining reality. I have also learned that “dull is dead.” That is to say, a story that plods along, says little and only barely scratches the surface of intrigue will never see the light of day in the market. Finally, I have learned that I like to write far more than I like to edit – so I am deeply grateful for the editors who have looked at my works and given them such deep attention.

What are the five best things writers can do to meet the challenges of the 21^st century?

Five best thing – here they are:

1. Hone your craft! If you’re a writer then, as much as it is possible with you, be the best—and get better.

2. Learn your audience. They are real people who read your words and you must reach them. Too many authors live in the analytics of sales—and forget that there are hearts to be touched not just books to be sold.

3. Find your audience. Now that you have learned about them – go and find them! They are out there, waiting to hear from you. Where do they hang out? Are they social insiders or outcasts? Find them.

4. Love your readers! You will never become a best-selling author without people buying your books. It is not you who is great. You didn’t make your audience… they made you. Be humble and know that your readers have loved you – so be grateful to them.

5. Remember reality. Yes, I said it… don’t live in your fictional worlds! Use your gift of writing to speak to the world at large, but you must not lose yourself. You have family, loved ones, spouses, children, parents… all who love you and still need you. Becoming an author can dominate a life, to the point of decimating that life. Walk away from the keyboard once in a while and walk hand-in-hand with real people.

Getting to know you:

What’s been a favorite work experience you’ve had so far in life?

Being the pastor of my church. I love to share God’s word with them and to see them grow in the grace and knowledge of Christ.

If you could do anything you want, what would it be?

I would be a pastor and an author (and be able to make a living at both J).

What’s the most exotic place you’ve traveled?

That would have to be South Korea. I spent a year there in the military (USAF) and traveled all over the country, hiking through the mountains and enjoying the hospitality of the Korean people.

What do you see outside the closest window right now?

Whitehorse Mountain – it stands at about 7,000 feet.

What do you tell people when they ask “and what do you do?”

I tell them that I’m the “Doctor Who” of the body of Christ.

Where’s your favorite place to grocery shop?

OOO... wrong question! I hate shopping – but if I MUST go, it would be Safeway.

What, to you, is worship?

The yielding up my life in obedience to Christ for the praise and glory of God.

Connect with Michael:

 

Rev. Michael Duncan,

Pastor: Mountain View Baptist Church

 

Owner: Literary Video Creations

Co-Host: Alive in Christ Radio Network

Author:

Shadows: Book of Aleth, Part One

 

Revelation: Book of Aleth, Part Two

 

Shadow Remnant

When the Heart Heals

Sisters at Heart - #2

By Ann Shorey

978-0-8007-2073-5

$14.99

Paperback

352 pages

Pub Date: February 2013

 

 

Readers are invited to travel back to 1867, to the town of Noble Springs, Missouri, for an engrossing story of love's  tentative first steps and fragile future in the face of opposition. With tenderness and grace, Ann Shorey tells the story of Rosemary, a sympathetic but strong woman determined to thrive in a world that doesn't always understand. 

Courageous and unconventional, Rosemary Saxon served as a nurse during the Civil War, a service that has caused most women in town to regard her as unfeminine and downright vulgar. Although she would like to put her experiences as a nurse behind her, she must support herself. She takes a position with Dr. Elijah Stewart and a mutual attraction begins to develop. But when a sophisticated woman arrives in town claiming to be Elijah's fiancée, a heartbroken Rosemary decides to leave Noble Springs and start fresh. Can Elijah convince her of the mystery woman's deception before he loses her forever?

Ann Shorey is the author of Where Wildflowers Bloom, The Edge of Light, The Promise of Morning, and The Dawn of a Dream. She has also published selections in the Cup of Comfort series and in Chicken Soup for the Grandma's Soul. Ann and her husband make their home in southwestern Oregon.

My review:

A son and daughter born of a Southern mother return from serving with the Union Army during the Civil War, are shunned by their parents and must make their own way. They move a few hours from St. Louis, Missouri to Noble Springs. The second book of the Sisters at Heart series picks up after Rosemary Saxon’s brother Curt has married and moved to his wife’s home, leaving Rosemary alone in the small house. Rosemary may be on her way to spinsterhood, but she values her independence above all else. In an era where women are expected to work at home, or in gentle pursuits, perhaps with a family business, Rosemary can offer the only work she truly knows, that of nursing wounded soldiers, and preparing herbal remedies from her mother’s recipe files.

With Curt gone and a new doctor in town, Rosemary puts on her courage and visits Elijah Stewart, a doctor she’d worked with only a few weeks in St. Louis before he’d been shipped out to the front. He doesn’t remember her at first, but is convinced having a nurse involved in his practice is wholly unnecessary. Until he thinks about it, and decides perhaps someone like Rosemary in the office, greeting patients, keeping records and tidying up the place would work in their favor, never mind the fact that they’re attracted to one another. When he learns Rosemary takes in stray people, and has been mixing up and dishing out herbal remedies, he is naturally on his guard and disapproving, again, until he thinks about it.

Several issues hamper this couple’s courtship, including potential love interests on both sides who wreak havoc with everyone’s emotions, along with a mysterious stalker and vandal who accuses Rosemary of awful things, and Elijah’s father who would rather have his son in Chicago.

Shorey’s characters are unconventional, certainly; Rosemary teeters on the likeable scale, even after we get to know her. The author reminds readers people are people, and not always sweet and even-tempered and romantic. Noble Springs feels like a cozy community, but peopled with fallible souls who are quick to listen to gossip. Love triangles that don’t  go anywhere, and a main character who is as quick to judge as the townspeople who hurt her don’t truly deflect from the story, which is, after all, about love and redemption. Rosemary learns forgiveness is a two-way street, and independence is good, but a soul mate to depend upon is better. Told from both Rosemary and Elijah’s viewpoints, the story is built across a number of entwining subplots of romance, mystery, and danger, the author leaves plenty of room to explore what’s sure to be another sequel.

“Available February 2013 at your favorite bookseller from Revell, a division of Baker Publishing Group.”

Wife "SOS"!

Wives Saving Marriages Attend The Wife S.O.S. Event Online Thursday, Feb. 14, 2013 Noon - 4 PM Central Time All from the comfort of your home!

Register to Win at Right.

This four hour live-cast webinar includes the four keynote speakers and worship leaders shown below, live Facebook and Twitter parties all afternoon, plus prize drawings each hour. Attend by webinar here or by phone at (206) 402-0100 begin_of_the_skype_highlighting FREE (206) 402-0100 end_of_the_skype_highlighting , Access Code 876918#. The event is 100% free and online. Register at right for the chance to win free prizes and invite every wife you know! Click on the ticket, poster or flier downloads at left.

Breaking the Marriage Code Register to Win Lindsay's CD: My Song Tap Into Pam & Bill's:! The Marriage Code Keynote Speaker, Pam Farrel, launches us with the keys to lasting love. Lindsay Huggins leads us in worship as we launch into this awesome afternoon. Order your own copy of The Marriage Code by Bill & Pam Farrel. Book and study guide. Available in paperback or audio.

Loving a Wayward Husband Read Vicki's Book: When Your Husband is Addicted to Pornography Keynote Speaker, Vicki Tiede, shares what wives can do if they find their husband is involved in pornography. Enter into worship with with Pastor, Singer, Songwriter, Brenda Kilber. To learn more, read the book, When Your Husband is Addicted to Pornography by Vicki Tiede.

How to Change Your Marriage for the Good		Read Kathi's Book: The Husband Project
Keynote Speaker, Kathi Lipp, shares a doable plan that will help you turn your marriage around in 21 days.	Enter into worship with Leann Albrecht with music from her recent release, Sreaming on the Inside.	To learn more, read the book, The Husband Project by Kathi Lipp.

Great Sex: God's Idea of Great Fun! Read Shiela's Book: The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex! Keynote Speaker, Sheila Gregoire, shares humor, research and a fresh Godly perspective on this age-old topic. A beautiful, powerful voice and messenger, encounter the Lord in worship with Jagee Melton. To learn more, read the book, The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex by Sheila Gregoire. The webinar box at left will get bigger and go live on February 14, 2013. You may listen here or call in at that time to (206) 402-0100 begin_of_the_skype_highlighting FREE (206) 402-0100 end_of_the_skype_highlighting , Code 876918#. The replay will be available! Click the icon to join the Wife S.O.S. Facebook party page in advance and to invite your friends! The party goes live on the 14th. The live Wife S.O.S. Twitter party will be hosted at Tweetchat, #WifeSOS.

In the United States, over 50% of first marriages end in divorce, 67% of second marriages end in divorce, and nearly 74% of third marriages end in divorce.^g  

Statistics show that 2/3rds of divorces are initiated by women. And according to a New Woman’s Day and AOL Living poll, 75% of women surveyed have considered leaving their husbands at some point. 

The economy is tough and CNN reports that financial pressures are the biggest stress on marriages in the past 60 years. 

The demands of life are also taking a toll: According to one study, the average married couple spends just four minutes a day alone together. 

One in three American marriages is “low sex” or “no sex.” While promiscuity is on the rise: Nearly 60% of married adults have had at least one affair and even if partners marry after an affair, over 75% of those marriages end in divorce. 

A University of Chicago study by Dr. Linda Waite, proved that staying married, despite a tough situation, is the most likely way to be better off relationally, financially and personally after five years than divorcing. In fact, 2/3rds of the couples in the study who stayed together were happy, and even those who were still unhappy in their marriage, were no less happy than those who had opted for divorce during the 5 year study. The unhappy couples were traced for five years: 2/3rds of those who stayed together reported happy marriages at the end of five years.  

Among those who rated their marriages the most unhappy, 8 out 10 who stayed together showed dramatic turnarounds including the happiest ratings of all in the study.  

In addition, the study found that on average unhappily married adults who divorced were no happier than unhappily married adults who stayed married when rated on any of the 12 separate measures of psychological well being. Divorce did not typically reduce symptoms of depression, raise self esteem, or increase a sense of mastery... Even unhappy spouses who had divorced and remarried were no happier on average than those who stayed married. 

 

References

^a Boswell, John. 1995. Same-Sex Unions in Pre-Modern Europe. New York, NY: Random House.

^b Bride’s Book of Etiquette. 2002. New York, NY: Perigee Books.

^c Connolly, Katie. “Why So Few D.C. Residents Are Married.” Newsweek.com. October 20, 2009. Accessed: October 28, 2009.

^d Gottman, John M. and Julie Schwartz Gottman. 2006. 10 Lessons to Transform Your Marriage. New York, NY: Three Rivers Press.

^e Graff, E.J. 1999. What Is Marriage For: The Strange Social History of Our Most Intimate Institution. Boston, MA: Beacon Press.

^f “Groom.” Online Etymological Dictionary. Accessed: October 27, 2009.

^g Harrar, Sari and Rita DeMaria. 2007. The 7 Stages of Marriage: Laughter, Intimacy, and Passion. Pleasantville, NY: Reader’s Digest Books.

^h Hein, Holly. Sexual Detours: Infidelity and Intimacy at the Crossroads. 2000. New York, NY: St. Martin's Press.

ⁱ “Husband.” Online Etymological Dictionary. Accessed: October 27, 2009.

^j Mannes, George. “Is the Economy Ruining Your Marriage?” CNN.com. August 21, 2009. Accessed: October 27, 2009.

^k Moore, Matthew. “Divorce Damages Your Health—and Getting Remarried Barely Helps.” Telegraph.co.uk. July 27, 2009. Accessed: October 28, 2009.

^l Neal, Rome. “Signs of Divorce Ahead?: New Study Tries to Predict Which Marriages Will Last.” CBSNEWS.com. August 7, 2002. Accessed: October 29, 2009.

^m Squire, Susan. 2008. I Don’t: A Contrarian History of Marriage. New York, NY: Bloomsbury Press.

ⁿ “Where You Live May Affect When You Get Married.” CNN.com. October 20, 2009. Accessed: October 28, 2009.

^o “Wife.” Online Etymological Dictionary. Accessed: October 27, 2009.