Bethany’s Calendar review
Elaine Marie Cooper
Cross River
2014
ISBN: 978-1936501229
Nonfiction memoir
$12.99 paperback
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Poignant reflection and brave advice for the grieving.
From the author’s introduction of her family heartbreak,
through the honest and vulnerable challenges of home and social life through
this difficult time, to the joy of remembering, Bethany’s Calendar will touch
every reader.
The one thing Elaine Cooper was certain she never do after
she realized a dream of writing fiction based on family history was the write
about the death of her daughter to cancer. It took a decade before Cooper
heeded the gentle nudges and was able to put the story into perspective and
make it more than a reflection, but also a guide to help others who are in
grief. It is a story not just for a family suffering through trauma, but
everyone who intersects with them. Advice on how to approach, when, or even
whether, people who are in treatment, in pain, or caring for loved ones in
pain, is offered with each of the 35 short chapters, as well as in an ending
segment, Things We Learned.
The Coopers rejoiced when their daughter Bethany, a
valedictorian and caring, resourceful young woman, went to college. The first
three years were on task, as expected. The fourth was a strange struggle for
her, as well as inexplicable changes in her personality. An attempt at
independent living and work across country failed, as did a dream job at home.
Drugs were ruled out, as was a psychotic break. Physical tests done after a
bizarre episode at home which resulted in a police pick-up and subsequent
several-day stay in a hospital psychiatric unit revealed the devastating news
that Bethany had cancer in her brain.
While the author’s training as a nurse helped her understand
the physical issues involved with treatment, and that there would be no
recovery, the emotional distress for the family and friends is never something
anyone can prepare for.